


Unexpected Sex Goddess Aisling

by T_Callaghan



Category: OMGWACA series, Oh My God What A Complete Aisling, The Importance of Being Aisling
Genre: Awkward Boners, Awkward Sexual Situations, Awkwardness, Comedy, Domestic, F/M, Forbidden Love, More like domestic fluffer, Not Really Domestic Fluff, One Shot, Romantic Comedy, Short One Shot, Slice of Life, Thou Shalt Not Fuck Thy Boyfriend's Housemate, Thou Shalt Not Fuck Thy Housemate's Girlfriend, okay that's enough tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-08
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2020-11-27 14:56:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20950250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/T_Callaghan/pseuds/T_Callaghan
Summary: Piotr is quickly learning that sharing a living space with people you barely know can lead to some awkward moments. Like assuming your housemate's girlfriend is the cleaning lady. Or realizing later that night the bedroom walls are awfully thin. And having to pretend the next morning you hadn't gotten turned on while hearing her moan, and definitely hadn't shoved your hand in your boxers while feverishly picturing what might be going on under that thick jumper she was wearing.Typical housemate stuff.Right?





	Unexpected Sex Goddess Aisling

**Author's Note:**

> Just finished The Importance of Being Aisling, and while it was great I NEED something to happen between Aisling and Piotr. 
> 
> Poor sad rejected Piotr, with his strong arms and rippling abdominal muscles, bereft of a woman's touch. 
> 
> So here's a little fanwork from Piotr's point of view about his first impression of Aisling.

It took a few days before Piotr realized how thin the walls were at his new place. 

His housemate John worked late often, and had a busy social life playing some sport Piotr had never heard of. Between the late hours at work and going down to the countryside on weekends, John was hardly ever at home, which made him an ideal housemate in Piotr’s eyes. 

Much better than Cillian, who was a semi-permanent fixture in the living room, and didn’t understand that Piotr’s leftovers weren’t a communal resource. Piotr had never been the kind of person who did things like this before, but he was starting to consider labeling his tupperware containers. 

He was frowning at the meal he was cooking, feeling vaguely guilty knowing that without his leftovers, Cillian would resort to eating cereal for every meal, when a slightly frumpy woman with messy hair popped up at his shoulder and scolded him for using too many paper towels. She thrust a tea towel at him. 

He took it, wondering whose extremely young grandmother this was. “I thought we were out of clean kitchen towels.” The mystery woman waved her hand in the direction of the laundry. “I just finished a load. I brought some laundry soap over.” 

The corner of Piotr’s mouth twitched up. “The lads didn’t tell me they got someone in to do the cleaning.” 

She pursed her lips at him, evidently not sure he was joking or not. Piotr wasn’t completely sure either. He laid 50/50 odds on her being a mothering girlfriend of either Cillian or John, or a slightly bossy maid. 

Cillian came in and squeezed her shoulders. “Ais! Did you bring toilet roll with you?” The maid-or-girlfriend rolled her eyes. “Yes, in the bag by the door.” He rushed off to collect it. “You’re a lifesaver.” 

“I didn’t bring any more kitchen roll though,” the girl said, raising her voice so Cillian could hear but cutting her eyes across to Piotr. 

“I’m glad he has someone to mind him,” Piotr said, refusing to be intimidated. “I meant to tell him to stop eating my leftovers, but I was worried he’d suffer a nutrition deficiency.” 

The woman--Ash?--absentmindedly said something about how it was nice to have someone in the house who actually knew how to use the kitchen. Then she looked at the collection of dirty mugs on the table. “And do you only know how to use the stove, or do you know how this works, too?” She pointed at the dishwasher.

Piotr raised his eyebrows. “If you talk to Cillian like that, I think the two of you will not be dating long.” 

She let out a short laugh. “Cillian is my cousin.” 

“I see,” he said, glancing over with new interest. He put a few mugs in the top rack to appease her.

“I’m dating John.” 

“Ah.” He closed the dishwasher. “So, you must all be from the same small town.” 

“Yes,” she said defensively. 

The tension was broken when John walked in and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Oh, have you been introduced? This is Aisling.” The first thing she said to him was something about the rest of the dirty mugs. Piotr was relieved when John suggested they go out to eat that evening. They went out, leaving him some peace and quiet.

Piotr shook his head and went back to stirring his pan. John hadn’t mentioned having a girlfriend, and he’d greeted her with the kind of chaste kiss on the cheek you’d give your mother. Wouldn’t he be living with Ash--Aisling if things were serious? He wondered if John was keeping the relationship going to avoid any awkwardness with her cousin, and to keep benefiting from the free housework she did. He had to admit the kitchen looked noticeably better after just a few minutes of her tidying up. 

When his food was ready, Piotr watched TV with Cillian and then furtively hid his leftovers in the back of the fridge. With a bit of guilt nagging at him, he thoroughly cleaned the pan he’d used and left it in the drying rack. 

He went to bed early, before John and his cleaning lady--girlfriend--got back from their date. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


Piotr woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of rhythmic squeaking. It sounded like someone doing a gymnastics routine on a trampoline--oh Jesus Christ, it must be the bedsprings in the room next door. 

John’s room. 

It was dead silent in there save for the squeaking. Piotr winced. Was she just lying there placidly? That wouldn’t surprise him exactly, but he hoped she was enjoying herself at least. She was already doing enough favors for her boyfriend--all the housework she helped out with when they didn’t even live together. 

A low moan bled through the wall. 

Ah. Seemed like she was enjoying herself after all. Well, good for her. Piotr scrunched his pillow around his ears. 

It didn’t do much. There was masculine grunting now accompanying every squeak.

“Ah--ah--ahh, John! Harder!” Jesus. Obviously Piotr had been too quick to guess she might be someone who thought of sex as a favor that women did for their male partners. Good for Aisling that her relationship wasn’t all housework and no reward. He didn’t want to hear proof of it though. 

The grunting came in increasingly short and fast bursts. The squeaking sped up. There was a long, guttural, heartfelt moan that went high and breathy at the end, and Piotr’s dick finally sprang to attention. 

He’d been groggy when the noise first interrupted his sleep, but was wide awake now. No longer in that dreamlike space between sleeping and waking, he felt acutely the awkwardness of this situation. What kind of sociopath would beat it off over the sound of his new roommate and his girlfriend having sex? But he was hard as a fencepost, and how was he supposed to think of anything else when they were so loud? 

Hadn’t they had a housemate stay in this room before? Didn’t they realize how easily the sound carried? 

Piotr was desperate to think about anything else, but as his traitorous hand inched below his waistband, he found himself wondering what exactly his roommate’s girlfriend had going on under that dumpy sweater she’d been wearing. 

He felt guilty picturing her naked. The next image his brain conjured up wasn’t any better--Aisling doing various household chores dressed in a French maid outfit with a very short skirt. Piotr gripped the base of his erection in an attempt to quell it and wished the couple in the other room would finish soon, but apparently they were taking their time building up to a big crescendo. 

Horrified, Piotr suddenly realized if he waited till they finished to jerk off, they would be able to hear him. They’d immediately know he had heard everything. And worse, they’d know he was masturbating because he’d heard them. 

Stupid Dublin housing market. Piotr was making good money, he shouldn’t have to be dealing with awkward housemate situations like this. 

Piotr loosened his grip and let his hand fly up and down his length, driven by a desperate need to rub one out before all the racket subsided next door. He tried to think of something else, anything else. What was the last porno he saw? He couldn’t remember it now. But ultimately what pushed him over the edge was the image of a voluptuous Aisling, stuffed into a slutty French maid outfit, bending over in front of the dishwasher and putting mugs into it. 

Piotr bit the pillow and jerked off frantically, determined to muffle the sound as much as possible. Humiliatingly, he finished at the same time as John and Aisling. He was left panting in the silence with a sticky mess in his boxers, slightly sore abs, and a disturbing feeling of having been pulled into some kind of disjointed group relationship with his housemate and housemate’s girlfriend without his consent. 

Piotr pulled off his boxers, wiped himself off, and dropped them over the side of the bed. He’d have to plan to be out of the house during Aisling’s regularly-scheduled nights over. At least her being an organized control freak would make it easier to avoid her. 

Soothed by having a plan that would prevent this painfully awkward experience from happening again, Piotr fell back asleep. 

He dreamed about lying across Aisling’s lap as she berated him about the messy kitchen and threateningly brandished a wooden spoon. 

  
  
  


The next morning Piotr woke up early, sleep-deprived but too wired to get back to sleep. He sat up quickly, anxious to escape the room before John and Aisling could start have sex again. He pulled on some sweatpants and fled downstairs to the kitchen. 

John was standing in front of the coffee maker, wearing just a pair of gym shorts. Piotr raised his eyebrows at the faint pink marks raked down his back. John looked up and stepped to the side. 

“Oh, sorry, just bringing some coffee--” he gestured upstairs. “Aisling stayed over, she’s got an early commute.” 

“Yes, I may have to get some of those headphones that cancel the noise.” 

John looked stricken. “You could hear--” 

“Just the bed,” Piotr lied, in the interest of still being able to look his housemate in the eye. “I think maybe you need a new boxspring.” 

John laughed weakly. “I might have to plan a trip to Ikea soon. I’m so sorry, my old housemate never mentioned the, um, noise.” He frowned, obviously taking a moment to worry if his ex-housemate was an auditorily voyeuristic creep. 

“He was maybe heavy sleeper.” Piotr did his best to smooth things over. “I’m sure, once I get used to the new place, I’ll be a more heavy sleeper too.” 

John nodded and walked past him. Unable to resist a jab, Piotr added, “If your girlfriend has early commute though, maybe don’t keep her up so late.” 

John’s ears went red and he disappeared up the stairs. 

Piotr helped himself to the leftover coffee. Today he was going to talk to his manager at the bar about getting scheduled on Tuesday nights. He was also going to finally ask out the cute waitress who smiled at his jokes. 

He wasn’t going to let himself get fixated on his new housemate’s girlfriend. Especially when he wasn't even sure if he liked her as a person. She’d been pretty rude to him the very first time they met. He wished he didn’t know what she sounded like when she came. That was the only reason he’d thought about her last night. He didn’t want to sleep with her. 

Though he was pretty sure that if he did, he could make her tear up his back worse than that.

**Author's Note:**

> Will Piotr and Aisling's insanely good chemistry ever come to carnal fruition? Who knows!!! There are obvious reasons why dating would be awkward, but Aisling already has one one-night stand under her belt since her Vegas trip. Who's to say she wouldn't have another? Bit of a dark horse compared to book 1, isn't she?
> 
> If it doesn't happen in the Aisling sequels, I may write another fic!


End file.
